“ I looked for a while and gave up, and decided to cling to what I more or less had…”

That’s a quote from a woman talking to me about her current husband, who she just had a baby with, and it just made me sad. When you marry someone, and have kids with them, it’s typically under the assumption that you love one another. That you’re dedicated to one another, and want to spend the rest of your life with them. Not that you looked elsewhere, couldn’t find anything better, and so you decided to settle.

I know love is a fickle thing. I know it has ups and downs, it can hurt multiple people. It can be confusing and rarely does it ever make sense in fact. It’s one of the strongest emotions out there, if not THE strongest. Movies are made about it, books are written, and songs are sung. It makes people do crazy things that others would never even dream of doing, and most of all it makes us ask, WHY.

Being in love is wonderful. The world turns just for you. I’m a firm believer that even a perfect relationship has issues. I use the term perfect loosely as there’s really no such thing, but it could be perfect to you, perfect for you. Even with those lumps and bumps that make it human. Without arguments how else would we even grasp that we’re human. Capable of error.

Not sure why I’m rambling about this today, and it doesn’t even make much sense, but it’s on my mind none the less. When have I ever made sense anyhow. I just wonder why with so many other issues out there, people would choose to settle in one of the few things they have complete control over. Unless of course your culture doesn’t allow you to choose your own mate or some such..

Eh, that’s enough ranting..

This weekend I wanted to take pictures - but of course didn’t get around to it. Did lots of shopping though, which is always fun. Decided to pick up a new air conditioner (the old one is.. at least 20 years old I’d guess, very heavy, very loud, and not very good on electricity) and get it before they were out of stock and prices went up. Managed to find one for $100, not bad at all. It’s not as though I have to turn the apartment into a freezer in order to be comfortable. That, and my desk is right next to the window anyhow, so I’m sure it will be fine.

Decided to put myself on an exercise regime as well as a new diet. Not because I’m concerned about my weight but because I find I’m out of breath and tired after things that I wasn’t before. I realize that it could simply be because I’m getting older and lets face it, that’s life, but I’m only 27 and while I used to walk every where, now we drive. Over time I’ve become less active. So, it was time to change that.

Picked up some 5 pound wrist weights (or ankle, if that’s your thing) and resistance tube (with handles). Also picked up some one a day women’s formula vitamins, and a lot of healthy food (which is normal, I’m not keen on eating junk anyhow).

Now, the pigeon problem has become significantly worse. I used to think it was cute, but then they started dropping off their bugs and stuff to build a nest onto my balcony. So they have to go. The other half and I looked up online natural ways to get rid of pigeons that don’t involve hurting them or shooting at them with bb guns (as was one friends suggestion) and found a few solutions. So far none of them have worked, go figure. Pigeons are not afraid of owls, so putting one up there wouldn’t work. Apparently, they’re supposed to be afraid of tin foil, so we strategically placed some along where they typically land. Which they promptly ignored.

Next? Today I’ll be crafting a bird mobile, out of old CD’s, some fish line, and some hangers. Hanging that from the ceiling of the balcony (which is concrete, so we’re doing it with industrial strength velcro..) and the shininess of the CD’s combined with the movement from the wind, is supposed to keep them at bay. We’ll see how that goes. Being city pigeons, I’m sure they’ll just start having little pigeon parties on my balcony with the CD’s as a disco ball. As it is now, I’ve been running outside every 5-10 minutes to scare them off the balcony by waving my arms around frantically - and even then they’re reluctant to move until I’m RIGHT up next to them. Grr.

Other then the bird excitement, it’s been quiet, blissfully so. Hopefully this week goes just as well!

This was taken from ABC news, and the story just horrified me.

Austrian police have arrested a 73-year-old man accused of locking up his daughter in his cellar for 24 years and fathering seven children with her.

A prosecution spokesman said Elisabeth Fritzl, 42, had accused her father, Josef, of “massive crimes”. DNA tests are being conducted on the woman and six surviving children.

It is the third time in recent years that Austria has been stunned by tales of children locked away by parents or adults they know.

According to police, Elisabeth Fritzl told investigators her father put her to sleep with an anaesthetic on August 28, 1984, handcuffing her in a locked basement.

Officially, she was declared a missing person, with Interpol opening an investigation.

A letter was sent to her parents asking that they stop searching for her and local authorities concluded she had been seized by a religious sect.

She told police that she spent years imprisoned in an underground chamber beneath the family home near the eastern town of Amstetten.

Elisabeth Fritzl told detectives she was “regularly abused” by her father and their incestuous relationship produced seven children.

All the children appear to have been born in grim captivity but investigators said one child, a twin, died shortly after birth. Police said the body was subsequently burned.

Three boys and three girls, now aged between five and 20, survived. Josef Fritzl legally adopted two boys and one girl.

Josef Fritzl is said to have told his wife, Rosemarie, and local authorities that three babies had been left by Elisabeth on their doorstep, in different years.

Each delivery was accompanied by a letter purportedly signed by Elisabeth Fritzl saying she could not support the child because she already had others to care for.

The trio went to school as normal, seemingly unaware that their mother and three other siblings (a girl of 19, and boys at 18 and five) were trapped underground.

According to ORF national television, the mother and five children are now in hospital. All are being treated by a team of psychologists. Reports said the mother was physically frail and badly disturbed by her ordeal.

Authorities were worried about the health of the mother and three of her children.

Yet neither neighbours nor social services appear to have had the slightest inkling. “They had a swimming pool in the garden, we would hear them laughing the three of them,” said one neighbour.

Another backed up the story of the babies on the doorstep, adding: “(Rosemarie) always looked after the kids so well, taking them to school. We said ‘it’s incredible what she manages to do at her age’.”

Police said the case only came to light after one of the girls, 19-year-old Kerstin, was admitted to hospital in a critical condition in mid-April.

Doctors stepped up efforts to find the mother, looking for background medical information, and Josef Fritzl brought his secret offspring into the family home.

He is said to have told his wife they suddenly re-appeared. Elisabeth Fritzl told investigators her mother knew nothing about the sexual abuse she had endured since the age of 11, some seven years before she was locked away.

Authorities found Elisabeth Fritzl and the three underground children on Saturday evening.

In a cell himself since Saturday night, Josef relented and gave police the security access codes to the basement on Sunday night.

Police found several rooms 170 centimetres high equipped with water and a television.

Josef Fritzl had been refusing to answer questions put by detectives, although Gerhard Sedlacek, a prosecution spokesman, said Elisabeth’s accusations of kidnapping and incest are “credible”.

Austria’s most notable prior case was that of Natascha Kampusch, locked up by a man in the basement of a house for eight years before she escaped.

Kampusch was 10 when Wolfgang Priklopil abducted her on her way to school in 1998. The 44-year-old kidnapper killed himself hours after she fled, throwing himself under a train.

Three young girls were also locked up for seven years by their mentally ill mother near Linz.

-AFP

Wow.  Now, in another story I had read claimed that the man justified his actions by saying he wanted to protect her from drugs and bad crowds in the world. This takes it to an entire new level though. There’s no justification for his actions at all from what I can see. I feel horrible for all those involved, and to think of what the girl and her children must have gone through locked in a basement for such a very long period of time. My mind also wonders why none of them managed to escape before. How no one could possibly know they were missing and hidden right there. How no one had any idea. Such a shame.

It’s not often I hear stories that gruesome thankfully.  I like to think that mankind is a good thing, with evil tendencies. Some times though of course I have to wonder.

It is not all bad though - it’s just what we hear most of. Like some bad accident in life that we can’t look away from the news is chock full of all the bad things. For the most part, all of the good things are hidden and not talked about nearly as much. Good deeds happen all the time though. Probably a lot more then any of us realize. It’s much the same way in video games, if you think about it. The loudest people are often heard the most - and those people are not always the pleasant ones to deal with. It’s the ones who go about their ways quietly, and are nice, who make the game a good place to be - who are rarely recognized for their efforts.

Did any of that make sense? Well, it did in my head.

Have you heard the story of Father Adelir Antonio de Carli?

He was a 41 priest from Brazil, who some how got it into his head that it would be a brilliant way to protest and raise funds and awareness for his causes, by strapping 100’s of party balloons to himself, and floating for 19 hours on a 750km course. He was strapped with a GPS, cell phone, and had experience doing this sort of thing, apparently.

Less then an hour into his flight, he called back and said that he was descending and would be unable to complete the trip, and then he went missing.

Who didn’t see THAT coming.

I mean. I feel really sorry for the guy, and his friends and family, but come on now. You have to draw the line some where. Did he not think some where in the back of his mind that this was a BAD idea? I never really understood how people could get a rush from these sort of things. He was an experienced skydiver, which is great. Why couldn’t he have fond a safer method of accomplishing what he wanted that wasn’t going to end in some sort of huge tragedy that honestly, could be seen a mile away.

Father Carli’s bundle of brightly-coloured balloons was found floating in the Atlantic Ocean off Santa Catarina state, near the point where he last made contact with authorities on the ground.

Apparently, fire department officials said that there was an 80% chance he was still alive — but that was on the 23rd of April. It’s five days later now. As far as I know he still hasn’t been found.  I don’t know about anyone else, but if any of my friends decided that this was something they wanted to do, even if they wanted to do it really badly, to raise awareness about truck drivers transporting goods over long amounts of time - I’d advise against it. Heavily. It’s just simply asking for trouble. I understand everyone has their hopes and dreams but it hurts too many people when you risk yourself in this manor.

I suppose in the end, due to the tragedy of this story he accomplished what he set out to do. World wide recognition of his cause. Some how I don’t think this is how he meant to do it though.

The rules from Oprah are defined below (stolen from her website):

• 1. This week, you will be eating at home every meal. No more eating out, no more takeout. And you have to eat your leftovers. If you throw food in the trash, you’ve got to ‘fess up.
• 2. For one week, you’re going to give up the bottled water habit. Get a water filter—time to get to know your tap.
• 3. No more disposable plates, cups, napkins or paper towels. Try cloth—you might like it!
• 4. For entertainment, you’ll have to rely on each other. For one week, I’m asking you to give up your iPods and video games, and your computers only get turned on for homework. TV is limited to one hour per night—one TV only.
• 5. That thermostat is going way down…to 69 degrees. If you get cold, put on a sweater.
• 6. Give your washing machine a break—try to wash only clothes that are TRULY dirty.
• 7. When you leave a room, lights out. Ditto for fans. When you’re done using an appliance, unplug it. Don’t forget your computer and cell phone chargers too.
• 8. Showers are going to be shorter—eight minutes max. Use a kitchen timer to help you keep track.
• 9. Want to go shopping? Head to your closets. That’s your wardrobe for the week. The mall is off-limits.
• 10. You final challenge—no buying anything other than food for seven days.

I heard about this challenge put out from Oprah on the radio this morning, so I went to check out the ‘rules’. A lot of those things seem quite common already - and I’m not sure if it’s due to where I live, or the upbringing I’ve had. The only one that would hurt would of course be #4. I’d be lost without my computer. I don’t watch tv so I’m not concerned about that - but no computer, no music, for a week? That would come close to killing me by the time all is said and done I think. Not that I spend LOTS of time on my computer, but it is a part of my daily activities, be it blogging (is that considered home work?) listening to Jango, emailing friends, or posting art. The rest of the things on the list I’m fairly confident that I could do. When I first moved out it was difficult for me to cook - I was so accustomed to cooking for five people. Cooking for one was a huge adjustment. Cooking for two takes even more adjusting. I try not to waste food, but it happens. We’re typically good about the left overs though, they get eaten and not so much is tossed away.

I wonder how many people are going to take up the challenge. I have to admit, I’ve never actually watched Oprah before, ever. I wasn’t even sure how to spell her name (thanks to google search for that) but I do listen to my radio and I do tend to find interesting things mentioned on there.

Last night I needed to pick up some celery and potatoes (curry tonight, roasted chicken tomorrow, nom nom) and while the grocery store was relatively quiet, the streets were busy. It currenty costs $60 to fill a tank of gas. The news is claiming by this summer it will be $80 to fill the tank, and $125 in four years time. That’s crazy. I’m glad I don’t drive or have the need for a car. Of course, the other half has a car and drives, needs to get to work after all. It affects more then just simple drives to work though. With my parents living 45 minutes or so outside the city it means less visits. Less trips.

Aside from the astronomical prices of gas - grains are going up in price. Which means meat will go up in price, and eggs. Bread. Everything is all tied together. I understand this is how the world works, and it’s natural - however we’ve been on a steady incline, one that almost scares me. I expect these changes to happen gradually, but we’re talking about as much as a 200-400% increase each year for the basics. hybrid cars are looking more and more appealing every year. Apparently Hyundai is coming out with an elantra hybrid in the next few years that will be affordable ($25,000) for folks. Looking forward to that at least.

Sighs. Some times, I wish I didn’t pay attention to the news.

A shameless plug for some of my art work I’ve got over at DeviantART. Who says all I do is game! This Christmas I was given my first ever SLR digital camera, an Olympus E-410, and I love it. I’m typically a pen and ink sort of artist as is apparent by some of my earlier pieces, but recently switched away from traditional art to delve more into photography. I’m still meandering my way through the phone book sized manual, but am having a blast with it in the mean time.

Ideally, I’d like the bit of code up above to go into one of my side bars in my wordpress template, but I use widgets, and have no idea how to go about that. I’m not a web designer, though it’s always one of those ‘things’ I’d love to teach myself. Speaking of teaching myself - I’ll be (hopefully) getting into HDR and tone mapping here in photography shortly. Should lead to some interesting pictures.

It’s finally raining here today, or at least I heard a few drops of water falling on the balcony outside. Now if only it’d last a little bit. It’s been unbelievably dry this year so far. Well, after we got all that snow at least. I know, I’m always complaining about too much snow, too little rain. It’s a Canadian thing.

One item this summer that I am VERY excited about, is the Blues Festival. In town here from July 3rd to the 13th there are so many people and events going to go on. Unfortunately I didn’t expect the tickets to be so expensive for an out door concert, but they are. It’s $185 for the week long pass. Ouch. Maybe I can see about getting a three day pass instead, and only going on the days I want.

There are seven stages set up, and each night a different artist (or two) per stage. Some major names are going to be in town. The festival is not just blues, but all forms of music. It’s the biggest music festival we have here, and I’ve never been before.

So who’s going to be there?

James Taylor, The Tragically Hip, Feist, The Black Crowes, Great Big Sea, Fergie, Akon, Three Days Grace, Matthew Good and his Band, Sam Roberts Band, Guy Davis, Samuel James, David Maxwell, Plain White T’s, and so many more.. those are just the ones off of the top of my head..

Wow. I am excited.

It should be a great time, especially if the weather holds out for that week. It’ll also bring a lot of people to the city, and of course that makes everyone happy with sales and what have you. It’s also pretty close to the celebration of Canada day, which is the 1st of July. That’s going to be quite the exciting two weeks. Of course, I won’t be anywhere near down town for Canada day. I went one year and it was horrile. There’s millions of people who flood to the parliament buildings to watch the fire works, and that’s just not my sort of thing. I get nervous with that many people around.

Going to be a great summer. I can’t take my lovely camera (Olympus E-410) with me, no cameras with detachable lenses. But I can take my smaller camera.

Last night was a treat, went to a sushi place here in town (well, over in Kanata actually) and enjoyed a nice 14 piece sushi set, while the other half had an 18 piece sashimi (sp) set. It was nice and fresh, and completely delicious. We shared a few bits and pieces, I ate some of his tuna. I loved my spicy rolls, and over all just had a fantastic time. It’s not often I get to go for sushi, it’s very expensive for one, and hard to find good stuff here. Toronto has the best sushi that I’ve had by far, but then again it’s in Pacific Mall, which of course caters to that whole food type.

There were plenty of people out and about in Kanata, it was nice and warm though. We could use some rain, things are still brown and bleak, and the leaves haven’t sprouted yet on trees. It doesn’t feel like spring yet, and we’re starting to get summer time temperatures. Ah well!

Other then that, not much to report on!

It’s just a movie. Or wait, is it? I’m honestly not much of a tv person. In the past sure there were shows I watched. Over time though, I’ve moved away from every single one of them. There are a few I still watch, Family Guy, Simpsons, a few cooking shows. Nothing on a schedule though, nothing I say “ok, I have to go for a bit, such and such is on”. In some ways, I actually miss watching a few shows. When friends and family are talking about what happened on the latest episode of a popular show - I don’t have the faintest idea. I do watch movies, but again not all that frequently. If something good is coming out I make a point to watch it, and I enjoy going to the theater a lot.

So it was that yesterday I spent the afternoon watching ‘Across the Universe’ which was a fantastic movie with an even better soundtrack. Set in the 1960’s it’s a musical about the Vietnam war and the people it affected. How they changed, how their lives changed. It was one of those movies that made you think, made you appreciate what you have in your life, and try to understand what things were like back then. I love movies like that. Of course the root of the movie was a love story - isn’t that what all the best movies are based around? There’s nothing so compelling in humanity then a good love story. The struggle of good and evil. The trials and tribulations of mankind. We thrive for this sort of stuff and I’m not even sure why. At least, I do.

Aside from the movie it’s been a fairly quiet weekend. Groceries yesterday and bought all fresh food again. It’s nice to be able to read the label on everything and be able to understand all the ingredients. Shopping’s been done at “Farm Boy” for a few months now, and my other half (and myself) have never had such a wonderful diet of food. Fresh, seems to be key. Even if it is more expensive then the processed goods.

I also picked up the latest (and for now last) book by Jacqueline Carey, Kushiel’s Justice. The books are twisted, I don’t deny that. It’s exactly the type of fantasy book that I feel appealing though - perhaps because it is like a mature version of Terry Goodkind’s writing. The characters leap off of the pages and you emphasize with the issues they go through. Any reader who can manage to do that for me is great in my mind. Then again, I’m a fairly avid reader so maybe I just had such a hunger for something, anything, to read that I blew up how much I enjoyed this particular series in my head. The first three books are from a female perspective, however the last two are from the adopted son’s perspective (of the female from the first three books). The change in perspective was smooth and flawless, and also intriguing - although it left me wanting to read more about her perspective again. Good books to check out if you’re into fantasy. Speaking of Terry Goodkind - he can’t publish books fast enough for me. I own all of his Sword of Truth series, in hardcover as well as his Bag of Bones book in a compilation. Not sure what he’s going to be working on now that ‘Confessor’ has come out. Robin Hobb is another great author I enjoy, as well as Karen Miller who wrote the ‘Awakened Mage’ series. Sarah Doughlass is another favorite of mine and I’m waiting for authors to put their books out in soft cover so I can purchase them. $40 for a book is a bit extreme for me to be paying when I buy a new book every other week or so. Books are expensive. I can’t see myself enjoying reading them online though - I tried once. I’ve thought about the readers that are out there that let you put online books on them - but I’m just not sure if that’s for me, either. We’ll have to see, I suppose. Eventually I’m going to run out of room to keep all these books anyhow, and I’ve already packed a lot away. With society turning more and more into an online / internet perspective, I wonder how many people actually still sit down with a good (natural) book. Reading blogs and overviews of things seems to be the way to go.

For my birthday this year a few online friends of mine sent along anime. I haven’t been as big into it as I’d like, mostly do to the cost and the difficulty involved in actually getting any here. If I were in Toronto it’d be different, they have the giant Pacific Mall that would cater to every oriental manga or anime out there. Ottawa however, lacks a little. So of course when I get a package in the mail containing anime I get all excited. Whether it’s purely because of the anime or because I just love getting mail, who knows. In any case.

I finally got the last four episodes of Inukami, which were pretty good. The story really picked up at that point and I watched avidly. It helps that the style is one I can get in to. After that I started watching some Genshiken, which was a little slow to start and the style is not quite what I enjoy, but I’ll watch the rest of it anyhow. Others that were sent to me were Izumo, Black Cat, WitchBlade, Claymore, Zero No Tsukaima, Shining Tears X Wind, Elfen Lied, and Rosariot Vampire. I’ve never seen any of them before. In fact my most recent anime watchings have been limited to Lodoss Wars, Chobits, and JoJo’s Bizarre Adventures so this was a refreshing change.

I’ve always been interested in the art styles, some more so then others. I’d try to emulate them in my own artwork

Along with the anime, I got some amazing Chinese tea. I don’t even know what sort it is, it’s just your basic tea I think. It comes in these round balls of dried up leaves, and you dump a few into your cup then pour the hot water over. The leaves eventually unfurl and become beautiful green leaves in the bottom of the mug. The tea itself is very good and doesn’t require anything at all added to it. As long as you’re a tea person at least.

I’ve never been huge into console games, but I did enjoy one pc game growing up. The sims, of course. I loved to build houses, of any sort. I loved designing rooms and little families. I didn’t actually care to play the game, but I loved designing everything. Painting with wallpaper, and downloading new materials. I even played the sims online when it first came out, I suppose that would be my very first mmo ever. I worked as a dj for a radio station and with a program called sam2 broadcast shows every morning, for an audience of 20-500. It was a great time. Eventually I realized how utterly boring the game was though, and moved on to other things. Back to the MUD I played and then shortly after, EverQuest1. I’ve never watched star wars or star trek but I did used to watch Xena. Greatest show ever. My mom used to watch as well. It seems like the older I get the more I spend remembering the past. I wonder if it’s supposed to be that way, or if it’s just a phase or something I’m passing through.